Our son's forever sister

A few weeks ago I received a card in the mail for our little Yun Xi. It was from Lianne, a young lady who was adopted from Yun Xi's orphanage back in July, back at the very same time that we were reading over Yun Xi's file and praying to know if he was our son.

The first several months after we submitted our Letter of Intent to adopt him, I thought that Yun Xi was in foster care. When I learned he wasn't, I was literally sick with worry. Finding Lianne was truly a God-given gift. She said that in the orphanage they were placed in family groups. She'd known "Xi Xi" since he was a baby and even taught him to walk. She called him her "Di Di"(little brother) and he called her "Jie Jie" (big sister).

This orphanage does not prepare the children for adoption. Yun Xi will learn about us either the night before or on the morning of Gotcha' Day. Lianne sent this letter to her Di Di to be read by our guide on the day we meet him.  If anyone would know the mix of emotions he might be feeling, it would be this young lady.

Yesterday I needed to wire our money to China, but before I went to the bank, I had a feeling that I should turn the car around and go get Lianne's card and have it translated. I took it to a local Chinese restaurant and after some confusion that I did not need a table for one, the owner said he'd be happy to translate the letter. He and his mother sat with me at a table at the back of the restaurant and when they looked at the card, they both oohed and aahhed over Lianne's gorgeous penmanship. The owner asked more than once, while pointing to her picture, "This girl wrote this?" He was amazed.

He told me that the top part of the card, on either side of her picture, it said, "Do you remember me?" and "This is a current picture of me." Then the owner began reading the main body of the letter. First, he'd read a sentence out loud in Mandarin and then translate it into English.

Dear XiXi,

How are you? Did you have a good Chinese New Year?

Then he read aloud the next few sentences in Mandarin, but didn't say anything for several seconds. I thought that he was maybe unable to translate it, but when he spoke, I realized that he had paused because he was struggling to stay composed. Her letter was so sweet and beautiful.

XiXi, I am telling you good news. Your family is coming--a loving father, loving mother, loving brother, and loving sisters. You are going to have a good life and happiness forever. You are going to have a nice home and then you will grow healthy, breathing fresh air. There will be a brother and sisters to play with you and you will not be lonely because they will love you and you will be part of their family. Congratulations, XiXi. Be a healthy and happy little boy, full of promise. Now you are still little and I don't know if you still remember me, but I am always your sister.

I was crying. The owner of the restaurant was crying. The owner's mother was crying.  All of us dabbing our eyes with napkins.  I went to the bank and it was with total joy that I wired that money to China. This little boy, a boy full of promise, is getting a family! We're getting a new son! It's a gift beyond price and we are so thankful.

An Almost Perfect Saturday

Rose was a nervous wreck this morning on her way out the door to her first cello recital. She's been playing for 2 months, barely enough time to figure out how to rosin your bow if you ask me, but Rose adores the cello and seems to have an affinity for it. Despite her beginner status, she needed to look the part, so we did her hair in a sophisticated up-do and found an appropriate cello-playing skirt, which isn't as easy as one might think.

She looks goofy and care-free, but she was nervous. Really, really nervous. Which made me nervous.

The recital was at an assisted living facility and the room was comfy and cozy with a TV set, fireplace, and squishy couches. Rose was essentially playing in "Grandma's family room", to an audience with compromised hearing. It was the perfect environment for her cello debut. She played 4 songs, three of which were accompanied by her big sister on the piano. Unfortunately, I had recording issues that weren't resolved until her final number--the duet with her teacher. Here's a sampling:

I could not be more proud of that girl. When she walked back to her seat, she beamed. She was so glad to be done.

And then her dad came in late, missing her performance. The recital was nearly over and Rose's teacher, sad that her dad missed her songs, called Rose up again for a repeat. I thought for sure she'd object, but up she went for round number 2.

Lyle was late for good reason. He was at Bruder's track meet, waiting in the rain for the mile run. It was worth the wait. Bruder got second place with an impressive kick at the end. The final time hasn't been posted, but Lyle guesses it was in the 4:50- 5 minute range. Not bad for his first meet of the season.

Then we went home and watched the BYU basketball game. We'd already had a wonderful cello recital and fantastic track meet and couldn't expect three for three. BYU got slaughtered.

It was an almost perfect Saturday.

For the truly dedicated (Grandparents, this means you), this is the "French Folk Song". I'm not sure why it's sideways. I do love how how she quickly scratches her nose midway through the song. She cracks me up. This song was added only two days before the recital, but I thought she did great.

Anyone want to record something for me?

Normally, I'm quite happy that we don't have T.V.

However, I've heard that Sunday night's episode of The Amazing Race will be in Yun Xi's city of Kunming and I simply must see it.

Can anyone help me out?

On a much more serious note, I was so upset to hear this morning of the earthquake in the Yunnan province. One report said that it was in "the countryside outside of Kunming," which had me so worried. Another report put me at ease that the epicenter was 120 miles away from Kunming. Still, we're just so ready to have our boy home.

Ten Day Forecast

THINGS TO DO BEFORE CHINA (a sampling)

1. Weed courtyard
2. Move boxwoods
3. Prune clematis vines
4. Spread mulch on entry beds
5. Organize bedrooms
6. Paint trim

THE LOCAL TEN DAY FORECAST

			High / Low (°F)	Precip. %
Today Mar 09		Rain / Wind	52°/44°	90 %
Thu Mar 10		Rain / Wind	49°/37°	100 %
Fri Mar 11		Few Showers	49°/40°	30 %
Sat Mar 12		Showers	47°/41°	40 %
Sun Mar 13		Showers	50°/44°	40 %
Mon Mar 14		Rain	51°/41°	70 %
Tue Mar 15		Showers	49°/38°	40 %
Wed Mar 16		Showers	50°/40°	60 %
Thu Mar 17		Showers	49°/40°	60 %
Fri Mar 18		Showers	50°/38°	60 %
Last Updated Mar 9 03:13 a.m. PT It looks like I'll be organizing bedrooms and painting trim. Anyone else ready for Spring?

Consulate Date? Check. Plane Tickets? Check.

I feel like a Mastercard Commercial:

Four new passports- $$$
Chinese visas- $$$$
Six plane tickets to the Yunnan Province- $$$$$
A family photo on Gotcha' Day with all five of our children- PRICELESS.

At least that's what I keep telling myself. Otherwise I'd hyperventilate.

On July 1st I saw our little boy's sweet face for the first time. I gasped, just as I did when I first laid eyes on Cholita. The difference was, with Cholita we were actually planning an adoption. With Yun Xi, there was no plan at all. I saw his picture by chance, on a website visited by hundreds of people every day. Through an amazing series of events, we were able to lock his file. And then, naturally, I panicked.

Excluding the time when I went to the store to buy dog food and came home with a miniature dachshund puppy, we are not impulsive people. Cholita's adoption was literally years in the making. We had planned. We had saved. We had already finished our paperwork. None of that had happened when we said YES to adopting Yun Xi. And yet, in those early days, we were blessed with so many signs affirming that we had made the right choice. When I worried about adopting a boy who would be nearly 4 years old, I met a man at my kid's swim lessons who introduced me to his delightful six-year-old son who had been adopted from Yun Xi's province only two years before. When I worried about money, somehow every time we needed it, the funds were there. When I worried that I didn't really know him, I got an e-mail from someone who had met him in China. "He's such a good boy," they said. When I found out he hadn't been in foster care as I'd assumed and worried that he'd have no concept of family, I met his "big sister", who had loved him in the orphanage from the time he was a baby.

Nearly eight months ago we submitted our letter of intent to adopt Yun Xi, looked at our calendar, and thought, "Wouldn't it be perfect if we could travel over Spring Break and bring the whole family?" I even wrote down our ideal travel dates and circled March 28th as our Gotcha' Day. Looking at averages, we knew that was unlikely. Looking at the averages, it would most likely be summer. But when I planted daffodil bulbs in September, I did it to welcome our boy home in the spring.

Well guess what? We'll be meeting our little boy on March 28th. The whole entire family will be all together in our baby's birthplace--Kunming--otherwise known as The City of Eternal Spring. I'd say it was meant to be.

Presidents, First Ladies, and Lemon Chicken

Teddy Roosevelt arrived at our home this evening looking every bit the Rough Rider that he was.   He told of his adventures hunting big game, his grief upon losing his wife and his mother on the same day, and reminded us frequently that we should speak softly and carry a big stick.

Jackie Kennedy's invitation was sent by Cholita, based solely on fashion sense and wardrobe.   Jackie carefully chose this lovely outfit herself, even attempting a 1960's hairstyle.

I'm sorry to say that there was an awkward moment for poor Jackie at dinner.  Abigail Adams (who you'll meet later) mentioned that she wrote in a letter to the constitutional convention that they should "remember the ladies."  Another dinner guest, Rutherford B. Hayes (Lyle) then made a joke about Jackie's husband remembering the ladies as well and then much to our horror, President Lincoln (Bruder) brought up the name Marilyn Monroe.  Jackie just focused on her lemon chicken, which she was eating with her hands, but we were quite sure she heard.  Franklin Pierce told Lincoln and Hayes that their remarks were in poor taste.

This lovely dinner guest was none other than Abigail Adams.  Her manners were impeccable and she was every bit the lady.  Jackie, much to our dismay, wiped her hands on the table and snorted loudly at all of the jokes. 

Abigail never snorted.  She nodded politely.  She made witty conversation.  She even consoled Rutherford B. Hayes when he shamefully admitted that he's often considered the worst president  to ever inhabit the White House.  "It's a hard job."

Franklin Pierce told the moving story of his son Bennie's death in a train accident on the way to Washington for the inauguration.  His subsequent grief rather crippled his presidency.  After a polite silence, Rutherford said that he had no excuse for his own poor job performance.  He just had no interest in the presidency and wanted to play croquet.

Lincoln shared witty quotes, Pierce told how he put the first Christmas tree in the White House, Jackie informed us that she knows her ABC's (she went into publishing you know), Roosevelt was charismatic and charming, Abigail told us of her letter-writing prowess, and all of us just wondered how in the world Rutherford ever managed to be elected.

It was a President's Day to remember.

And our TA arriving?  That was the cherry on top.  Next year I see Yun Xi making a great Millard Fillmore.

Guess what's winging its way from China right NOW.....

Our Travel Approval!!!!!  In record time!

I nearly hyperventilated last night when I read the e-mail.  "Can you be ready to leave next week?" they asked.

Breathe in.  Breathe out.  Breathe in.  Breathe out.

I almost scrapped our whole plan of taking all the kids during Spring Break. Yun Xi could be leaving the orphanage forever NEXT WEEK!  But, common sense prevailed and our kid's pleading eyes convinced us that waiting until Spring Break would be the better route.

But it's killing me.  Seriously.

Saved from an untimely demise

We have an ugly bathroom.  When we moved in nearly 7 years ago, we knew that our bathroom needed attention, but the master bathroom is easy to ignore.  Obviously.

With my nesting instincts kicking in as of late, I decided it was time.  The first thing that had to change was the paint.  I have no doubt that the previous owners had many gifts and talents, but painting was not one of them.  Maybe they had compromised eyesight, possibly poor lighting, but whatever the original issue, the stenciling didn't make it all better.  

As I was prepping the room for new paint, I looked at the laundry chute and decided it had to go.  I've never used it and the fact that a small child could fit down it has always made me a tad nervous.  

We live in a three story house, so it would be a treacherous trip to the laundry room.

Lyle was out running errands when I told the kids that the laundry chute was going bye-bye.  Their jaws dropped and weeping and wailing ensued.  I explained my safety concerns and the fact that the laundry chute was taking up precious real estate that could be used for cabinetry.  

They literally stood in front of the chute, shielding it from the sledge hammer with their bodies.  

"It's sentimental!" they screamed.  They each shared happy laundry chute memories.  "Do you remember the troll who went down the laundry chute?" asked Rose.  "Yeah," said Lucy, "followed by the toy search party?  That was great."  The stories went on and on, all told with pleading eyes.

I'd let their dad decide, I told them, quite confident that he'd agree with me.

The kids prepared for his arrival.  "Childhood or cabinet", said Rose's sign.  

Seriously, the drama level is strong in this one.  

And "You're 'chute'ing yourself in the foot" was obviously a Bruder creation.

The protestors met Lyle at the door chanting this little number created by Lucy: "One, two, three, four, kick the hammer out the door!  Five, six, seven, eight, the laundry chute is really great!  

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve, you don't need no extra shelves!"

Lyle listened to the mob, when frankly, I would have tear gassed them and sent in the riot police.  I still can't believe it, but Lyle sided with the protestors.  For now.  He just doesn't want to tackle the floor and ceiling issues now.  But the laundry chute's days are numbered, oh yes they are. 

 I will get my cabinets, childhood be darned.

On the Adoption Front

This photo is of a serious-looking Yun Xi learning the high-five with an American visitor to the orphanage.  He was two years old at the time and had such an adorable amount of toddler chub.  Seriously, those have got to be the most kissable cheeks I've ever seen.

He's so much more grown-up in the most recent photos I have, the ones I've carried around in my purse for nearly 7 months now.  Those pictures will be nine months old by the time we meet him.  He'll have grown and changed again.  Cholita's referral pictures were taken when she was five months old and she was nearly eleven months old when we finally laid eyes on her in China.  When I saw her, I knew those eyes and that mouth, but her hair was longer and crazier, she was thinner, she was tanner, and as weird as it sounds, just the fact that she was a three-dimensional, living, breathing, moving person completely blew me away.  It was like those rare occasions when you have a celebrity sighting.  That person you've only seen in pictures is now standing in front of you and you recognize them and almost blurt out, "Hey, I know you!", but you realize that you don't really know them and that they definitely don't know you.  And they just look different because now they're real, whereas before they were just an image.  Right now,  I know and love the Yun Xi image.  I can't wait to know and love the Yun Xi person.

I digress.  On the adoption front, things are clipping along.  Our paperwork is at the American Embassy in China waiting on the Article 5--something to do with citizenship.  That will be picked up on February 10th and then the only thing we're missing is our Travel Approval!  That's running about three weeks right now, so we're expecting to be able to buy plane tickets in the beginning of March.  I'm feeling fairly confident now that we'll be able to go over Spring Break.  And we're completely crazy and have decided to bring the whole clan.  

If I were to buy tickets today, I think we'd leave on Thursday March 24th, get to Kunming on the 25th and have our Gotcha' Day on March 28th.  At the end of our week in Kunming, Lyle will fly back home with Bruder and Cholita.  Bruder can get back to school and Lyle can deal with one of the little ones on the flight home, saving the other little for me.  I'll fly to Guangzhou with Lucy and Rose and Yun Xi and we'll stay there a week, probably coming home on April 8th.

Someone asked me yesterday how long this adoption was taking.  By the time we meet Yun Xi, the whole process will have been almost exactly nine months--a reasonable time-frame to expect a baby (or a nearly four year-old).  In that light, I'm well into the last trimester.  Thankfully nesting is a little easier without the big belly and today Lyle and I are building the Yun Xi bed.  Well, he's building, I'm supporting.

We can't wait to get our baby-of-the family home!

Beware: Woman with pruning shears....or hedge trimmer

Pruning has always been a bit of a mystery to me.  I know I'm supposed to do it and that it's good for my plants, but in my confusion, I've opted to just randomly whack off branches here and there and hope for the best.

Over the summer, it was clear that our Autumn Sunset climbing rose was overgrowing its bounds.  I consider it the focal point of our front garden and since the flowering last summer was only so-so compared to previous years, I decided to cut out the oldest cane.....

.......this bad boy, which seriously could be used as a weapon.

What I didn't realize was that this bad boy pretty much held up the whole top of the rose.  

I stepped back from the massacre and went, "oops".  Charlie has a look on his face like, "I had nothing to do with this.  I'm completely innocent."

I did find a vacant nest, a testament to some very brave birds.

Lyle came home that day, looked at our lopsided entry, and asked a very good question, "Why NOW?"  Massive pruning during the summer is not a good idea and not recommended by anyone who knows an iota about gardening.  It was just a bad spur-of-the-moment decision O.K.?   And I should mention that at the time, Bruder was refusing to get a haircut.

But I've learned my lesson (and mercifully Bruder has decided he looks better with short hair).  Last week I bought a big fat pruning book and religiously studied the section on climbing roses.  It suggested pruning in winter, when you can actually see the structure and know what you're doing.  What a novel idea!  I meticulously followed the instructions and after several hours of work, here is one side pruned and ready for a glorious summer:

I untied the whole rose and tied it all back on, spacing things out to evenly cover the trellis.

The other side obviously still needs some work and I'm debating on my method.  As I said, I followed the instructions for the first side: I angled my cuts, counting 2-5 buds from the beginning of each lateral. I cut out diseased or crossing branches and I thinned out the spindly growth.  But my favorite part of the pruning book, after literally pages of instruction, came in one little paragraph that left me laughing out loud (a rare thing in a pruning book).  It said:

"In recent years, the question has arisen as to whether using the traditional pruning method is worthwhile. Since 1990, a British program of pruning trials has been comparing traditional with quite revolutionary rose-pruning methods.  The most spectacular of the findings is that rose bushes that are simply cut down with a hedge trimmer flower as well, if not better, than those that are painstakingly pruned on traditional lines.  Hedge-trimmer pruning, with no attempt to remove dead wood, is, therefore now being recommended by some writers, though not by the body that hosted the trials, England's Royal National Rose Society."

So, you can spend literally hours measuring and angling each cut or you could just fire up the hedge trimmer and with a quick "NNNnnnRRRRrrrr" be done with it?  My past technique wasn't necessarily wrong, it was revolutionary!  Who knew?!  So, on the other side of my Autumn Sunsent I may just whack away with reckless abandon and see which side does better.  When I've finished my study, I'll present my findings at the next meeting of England's Royal National Rose Society.

I'm sure they'd like to know.